The best deal on the cheapest Goji Berries I could find were the 5 or 10 pound bags from Amazon. The company that sells these dried Goji berries is called Natural Arts Botanicals and you can – click here for the 5 lb bag that I buy.
Ironically it’s cheaper for me to buy them through Amazon than to buy them directly from their web site. Continue reading
This is my recipe for a great anti-anxiety drink, which consists of Goji berries, Blue berries (or Strawberries). I first heard of Goji berries when my wife was watching the new Dr. Oz Show. There is allot of information online from people trying to sell Goji berries of course, so I am going to make my own unbiased report (or review if you please)
So I finally quit smoking and it’s been quite the journey. It’s been 5 days with not a single drag. Chest feels better everyday, and breathing is a whole new experience. One thing has really helped during this time of cravings and change in lifestyle, and that has been berry drinks via blender.
So here are the ingredients of my anti-anxiety drink.
So obviously you put all of these ingredients into your blender in any order, but whip it up well before you add the ice cubes. Get your drink really liquefied well and add the ice cubes to give it the chill factor and the necessary water ingredient.
I usually blend this up at night and sip some when I ever I have a craving for a cigarette or some junk food. This blended drink tasted WAY better than any junk food or cigarette – believe me!
I FEEL allot of things since I started drinking this drink.
Not to say that you will have the same reaction I’ve having, but something is going on here.
So why would my body react to this drink the way it has. Let’s get into the berries in this drink.
So this is what the graph shows for anti-anxiety benefits from consuming Goji berries. Where is graph comes from, I have no idea, but it’s encouraging. You can look up many more graphs on Goji berries by clicking here.
click to enlarge image please
As you see with this graph you can see what most graphs show for Goji berries, blueberries, prunes, and spinach. So I see this as an accurate representation of comparison for the Goji berry and other berries.
It’s quite dramatic when you see these kinds of numbers compared. The next thing I did when I saw these numbers was buying Goji berries and consuming them. That’s next.
Even after searching the Internet high and low, I had trouble finding Goji berries for a low price (or for cheap). Even if the web site(s) claim to have cheap Goji berries, by the time you add shipping charges, it’s expensive. The Goji berry bag I bought online cost 10 dollars, but after shipping it cost me $30 bucks! Sounds really expensive right? Sure, but…..
So two (1 pound) bags of Goji berries lasts me one month if I consume 1/2 a cup per day in my shakes and drinks. So wow – $60 bucks a month! Not so cheap!
But wait. I smoked around 10 cigarettes per day, when I smoked, and that comes do around 300 cigarettes a month. Where I live it costs $10 dollars for a pack of 25 smokes. So let us do the math shall we. That is $120 dollars a month on cigarettes.
I will continue to find a cheaper source for Goji berries, and when I find that source, I will post it here. It’s still very expensive when you consider I can buy a bag of frozen strawberries, or frozen blue berries for $5 or $6 dollars. Even with all this, I can afford to drink these Goji/Blueberry drinks for less than it cost me to smoke cigarettes. I will continue buying Goji berries instead of cigarettes.
Note in the graph above that blueberries are very high antioxidant content, and prunes too. These are much cheaper to buy, so if you can’t afford to order or buy Goji berries, these cheaper berries would be a good substitute.
I love mixing these berries up in a blender because frankly, I don’t like fruit that much eaten out of the hand – so to speak. I can’t stand bruised fruit, and often don’t even like the taste or texture of fruits and vegetables. When you drink these berries with some orange juice and a bit of milk, it tastes great and the texture issue is then gone.
I can’t stress enough how important the bananas and orange juice is to this recipe. My Mom used to prepare sliced bananas in a bowl of orange juice and then sprinkle some sugar on it – YUMMY!
Even without sugar, orange juice and bananas tastes great. I would not make this shake without these ingredients – I’ve tried and it’s not nearly as good, but experiment at will.
So there you have it – Jacob’s anti anxiety drink. Enjoy, and most of all….
Relax.
Update: as promised, I said I was looking for the cheapest possible place to buy Goji berries online. I wrote a post on the Cheapest GoJi Berries I could find online.
This post was written for my mother, and about my mother’s anxiety and depression disorders in her life due to her abusive parents. It’s not to say that she is always suffering, but she suffers more than most people with “mind problems”.
One of the most frustrating things we human beings go through when we finally decide we DO want enlightenment, in an attempt to stop personal suffering, is dealing with the insanity which is all around us, and in our families.
We have family and friends who are still caught up in their own affairs and egos (as we all are), at the same time we are trying to tame our own egos, to stop the insanity it brings into our lives, and the lives of those who come into contact with.
For instance, I just had a family camping trip with my parents in the United States (Montana to be exact) and although it was great to see them, I was mystified at how out of connection my own mother seemed to be. A lot of it had to do with being away from home and away from Canada – I think.
It was plainly obvious that my mother is still plagued by strong feeling of grief, guilt, doubt, fear, general anxiety, and remorse.
Her basic inclination, even as she approaches her 70′s is negative, yet she tries to maintain a positive outlook. It’s plain to see the stress in her eyes, and it saddens me to see how much she has suffered at the hands of her own ego for all her life.
Now I don’t mean to say this as a negative or judgemental (bad judgement) thing regarding my mother. When I think of her now, I think of her with love and compassion, and see her standing their in the morning walking her little dog, and starting her new day. I feel a strong feeling of compassion for how she suffered greatly under the egos of her father, mother, and siblings.
You see – my mother was beaten and abused as a child. She was physically abused, verbally abused, and emotionally abused. She was taught to learn fear, guilt, pain, and sorrow every step of the way. Her father (my grandfather) truly believed that life was HARD and suffering was the name of the game. He suffered from a MASSIVE ego which justified the beating and abusing of his children, and the neglect of his wife. By all accounts, he was raised by people with the very same intellect. What are the odds that my mother would grow up knowing peace, tranquility, and a view of REAL life, which is actually beauty, love, compassion, and fearlessness – not a chance baby! But alas, the world is changing and more and more parents are tuning into the new age spirituality and getting away from guilt and fear based religions.
I see my mother walking home from school dreading what she was going to find, and experience, as she opened the door to her childhood home. I see her hiding in her room, which was organized to the tee, in an attempt to gain some sort of sanity in her young life. The tragedy is so great, that my heart sinks at this imagery. (don’t worry, this gets better)
As I said to my wife this morning, while I was eating my Eggs Benedict at Ihop, our parents’ examples are examples of lives we can use to learn from – not completely emulate.We must see the positive examples our parent’s set for us (which had many and mostly) and completely detach from any negative examples.
When I was a younger man, full of ego and brashness, I rebelled against my mother (and father to some degree) and told myself, and her, that I would not conform to her view of the world, or even the view of the back yard. I made it clear that I was going to go my own way, and that I knew better of what life was all about. The truth was that I KNEW the truth, but didn’t understand it. It’s taken me 30 years to even begin to understand and KNOW the truth. I feel like I am just beginning to learn now.
The truth is that the egos and insanity of past generations in our family, are automatically programmed into our child’s mind, and we learn to emulate our parents, IF we don’t learn to be witnesses of our lives through consciousness. When we begin looking at our family behaviors, and see our parents and grandparents objectively for what they are and were, we begin to break the chains of the insanity we inherit.
When my mother and I were talking about the anxiety (and depression) issues she has had in her life, my life, and my brother’s life, she mentioned that she was glad my brother and I never had children of our own. She was glad we never had children because, as she put it, “the chain is broken”, and the suffering can now end. I don’t see it this way.
I’ve thought a great deal about her comment since she said it (too much for sure), and it still baffles me that she sometimes looks at life with such a cynical lens. To even think such a thought shows the level of ego and destructiveness that still dwells inside her mind. when I think of her comments here, I still see my mother as the little girl walking to school crying because her father had strapped her legs with a belt, leaving painful cuts and bruises for her classmates to see. It saddens me – but at the same time it teaches me something very important.
What is important is to “break the chain” as my dear mother put it. To break the chain of ego, insanity, and destructiveness – in the very moment we breath today’s breathe. We must completely break the chains of ego we have created, and those of our parents, and their parents. To break the chains of fear, shame, and loathing, whilst we visualization them (our parents) in a glowing light of pure love.
What was so difficult for my mother, was that her father (and mother) had such strong egos – there was very little time for her parents’ true light and love to shine through. I know, and my mother knows, that her parents did have light and love to share with the world, and they did – but it never seemed to be often. At least that is what my mother, and her siblings thought. The children of this family were so tightly gripped by fear, resentment, shame, and dysfunction, that even when their parents had moments of compassion, sanity, and reality, they couldn’t see it. They could only see the past infractions and insanity of their parents, and dreaded the future bouts of insanity soon to come. The reason my life has been so much different, and why my outlook is so much clearer, is because I got to see the light of truth emanate from my mother and father far more often.
The reason my brother and I have suffered with depression and anxiety is because we were greatly effected by my mother’s pain and suffering. We were spared the more intense suffering that my mother and her siblings experienced, but nevertheless and ALAS, it was, and is present. But that is changing for me.
Not only do I understand my past, and the past of my parents, I understand the fundamental truth of life. I understand the insanity of ego and it’s destructive affect of the people on this earth. I know what satori feels like because I have experienced it. I know what “the light” looks like, and now the true relationship I have with my parents, their parents, and their parent’s parents.
Although my parents will always hold an intensely special place in my heart, my compassion for all human beings of earth, and all animals on earth, are no less intense. I see my parents as the people that gave me birth, cared for me, and feel a sacred bond with, but I don’t see my love for them as MORE than what I see for a stranger. This may sound crazy to some people reading this, but in fact this is an important reality in the new world coming. We must give the same respect and love towards strangers as we give our own parents.
Dear Mother, I have broken the chains already – the chains that you are talking about, that is. I don’t believe in the chains of fear, shame, guilt, anger, remorse, and ego’s insanity. I don’t believe in the fantasy of your parents’ evils, and the evils you imagine you have carried out. I don’t believe in a world that is frightening, and full of peril. I don’t believe that I am a carbon copy of you, and your parents. I am nothing more than another living and breathing soul on this earth, that was REALLY brought here to share love and compassion with all.
I know that to the ego controlled mind this could seem like a horrible insult, a detachment, a slap in the face, a disowning of sorts – but it is truly the exact opposite of these. When I detach myself from the negative fantasies of earthly ego-based humans, this includes my family. I detach from what is NOT real. I detach from what is fear, worry, guilt, pain, and disillusion. I embrace what is a real in you and in all human beings.
Dear mother, I embrace you in pure love and compassion. I embrace you as what you truly are – pure love and empathy. I know that this is not what you see often enough, but you know this to be true. The mother I’ve seen smiling as she contemplates a thought that is cheery. The mother that lovingly considers her two boys every day. The mother that bathed her two boys, loved her two boys, fed her two boys, and protected her two boys. The mother that taught her boys of right and wrong, and wrestled with every advancement of our young and adult lives. Yes – I fully and finally embrace with you with pride.
No mother, I detach from your fear and your fantasy of fear. I embrace what is truly real in you. So when you speak of your torment, and the past that emotionally crippled you so much that you could spend the majority of a month in gloom, I must detach with love. I see through these fantasies of gloom and fear, only seeing the TRUTH of you. The bright and clear truth of your actions and your dreams. I see the pure essence of your God connection and refuse to see you as a victim any longer. I refuse to see myself as a victim, and my brother as one too.
I fully except MY RESPONSIBILITY to see the truth if life and light. I FULLY EXCEPT my responsibility to detach from fearful fantasies, and embrace glorious reality. No longer will I let my egoic mind completely overtake an entire day or week. As a matter of fact, I will not allow my egoic mind to ruin even 10 minutes of my day if possible. Oh – I’m very aware of the human egoic mind now, and I put my own on notice. The real boss is my God essence – my third eye, so to speak.
So worry not my dear mother, I love you for what you really are. I see you for what you really are, even if you cannot at times. I except you for exactly what you really are, and do not see your egoic mind as you – the same as I do not see my egoic mind as me.
So fear not my dear mother, the chain has been broken. The full light of awareness and consciousness has made everything crystal clear. The egoic chains of destruction have been broken, shattered, and destroyed forever and ever – amen. The only thing left on the horizon, is light. In this light I see you for the beautiful human being you are today and all days. I see only what is real, and not what is false in you.
You see dear Mother – the chains were never really there. They were a mirage – a ghost – an fantasy – a dark nightmare. They were never there. They existed completely in our frightened minds, and the frightened minds of our handlers.
I will no longer support these chains with my flesh and bone. I will endeavor to destroy any imaginary chains before our flesh perishes from this earth.
What do you do when you get an anxiety attack or high stress levels out of the blue? Well, we’ve been through this many times on Sane Advice haven’t we. We just accept the current situation and accept the fact that we ALL have some “bad days” no matter how centered and relaxed with “think” we are.
So last post I was actually writing in the middle of a full blown panic attack which was quite the experiment for me. I could still think and type words on my computer, but I was literally in a huge anxiety fog or cloud. I tried to analyze what was going on in my life, and figure out why I was so freaked out all of a sudden. I looked at my personal life, my relationships, my sleep patterns, eating patterns, exercise routine (or lack thereof), my financial situation, my fun factor, my business, my medication – my health, and on and on and on and on. Of course thinking about it didn’t help much – just made it worse of course.
Then all of a sudden it lifted. For no rhyme or reason, my fear, extreme anxiety, and stress lifted. So out of the blue, the stress came on hard, and then the stress just left. The only thing I did different that seemed to help allot was the meditation I started doing with my brother and sister-in-law. they had just come back from Whistler, B.C., where they went to a Deepak Chopra event that lasted 6 days and nights. They went deep into the practices of relaxation, physical and mental centering, and you name it. They are meditating twice a day now, and it has changed their lives for the better. I will also be meditating going forward because it did make a huge difference in how I felt. Meditation may be the reason my anxiety just floated away out of the blue.
One thing I noticed before the stress came, was my “stinkin’ thinkin”. For some reason I was telling myself that everything I saw was crap. No matter how much I tried to remind myself of the truth – the truth being that everything is actually beautiful and perfect, which makes the ego mind very angry. In fact, when the ego mind is angry and making itself miserable, just hearing the truth drives it crazy.
I know enough now about how the ego mind works, that I should know better than to let it run amuck – right! – right!? ……… wrong. We all have our days (and sometimes weeks) when our egos take full control of our minds and bodies. When the ego is having full rein of our day(s) it goes hard like a starving bear in bakery.
I told my wife what was going on, and I said to her,
You know when the universe told my ego about enlightenment, it thought it heard entitlement.
She said,
Did you just make that up?
We both agreed that was kinda funny, so i thought I would share the line with you. You see, life is strange – we wake up one morning and decide that everything is pure bunk, and we completely throw out everything that is real and true. We know that this is the ego sensing some weakness, and pouncing into have a hay-day with misconceptions, exaggerations, fear, anger, and all around STINKIN’ THINKIN’. Now I didn’t make up that old phrase. That was something I heard my mother use after her Al-Anon meetings and readings.
I can see that in the future of my own life, these bouts with stinkin’ thinkin’ will be less and less frequent. I truly believe everything I say here on the blog, and I truly believe what Wayne Dyer, Deepak Chopra, Michael Beckwith, the Dali Lama, Eckhart Tolle, Jesus, and Buddha are saying. The step that I (and we) need to take is from believing to KNOWING.
We can read all of the blogs and books, go to seminars, watch DVDs, and listen to CDs until we saturate our minds with the truth – that helps – I’m not saying it doesn’t, but we have to get to stage of knowing, and not just believing. This is where meditation and lifestyle comes in. This is when discipline comes in. This is what the ego dislikes intensely.
The ego still wants to be lazy, sleep in, eat whatever it wants, never exercise, watch T.V. for many hours at a time, smoke, take drugs, drink alcohol excessively, and complain whenever possible about everything it sees. When you change these lifestyle patterns with discipline knowing comes in and believing becomes concrete.
Imagine never watching the news, reading a newspaper, or sad and violent television programming. Imagine never filling your body with cigarette smoke, or chewing tobacco. Imagine never drinking more than one glass of wine in a two month period. Imagine meditating twice a day for 20-30 minutes. Imagine exercising every day. Imagine only eating good food and never to excess. Just imagine.
For most of us humans floundering around, we have trouble imagining the above, because we have never lived liked that, and we shudder (or should I say our egos shudder) at such a lifestyle. I just read the above paragraph back to myself and it scares the crap out of me! (just kiddin’) But just imagine how we would feel. I read that and I think of how much that would change the lives of the people around me. I would be living a much different life of sure.
My suggestion to all (and to myself) is to slowly start bringing that lifestyle into reality. Start by eating “a little bit” better. Start meditating 5 minutes a day. Take a really short walk around the block every couple of days. If you smoke cigarettes, try cutting back a few cigarettes a day. You can do that by not smoking from pure habit, and only when you are really having a nicotine withdrawal reaction. Just start slow, and move towards healthier habits. DO NOT go hard and make yourself miserable by infuriating the ego. Be kind to your ego and treat like the spoiled little whiner child that it is. Slowly take your ego by the hand and compliment it on it’s efforts. Tell your ego that you are just going to back off the unhealthy habits “a little bit”, and tell your ego you have no intention of getting rid of it. Tell the ego the truth – it will always be there and a part of you, but it doesn’t have to fear anything. Say to your ego,
Everything is going to be O.K.
Which it is. The ego does like to hear these words too. Don’t forget that the ego is frightened at the prospect of ANY change at all. It fears goodness and happiness changes, it fears badness and unhappiness changes too. It wants everything to stay the same, because it’s barely hanging on to accepting what it real and what is now.
So when you are making these changes in your life, little by little, remind your ego that everything is going to be O.K. You can use affirmations which you can repeat over in your head. These affirmations are a wonderful method of quieting the frightened ego and it’s childish fears.
So when you see that out of the blue, you are feeling frightened, angry, unsatisfied with what is, or just plain sad and depressed, just know that it’s the ego at work, and it’s days and hours are surely numbered – and they are. The ego’s total control usually only lasts a day or so in most humans, before reality sets in and they begin to feel better.
For those of us who have BIGGER egos, we can go into the pain for weeks and sometimes months at a time. We end up sometimes taking medication just to calm ourselves down. We sometimes consumer unhealthy things like alcohol, drugs, and massive amounts of nicotine to try and feel better. Those of us with the big egos will suffer more, but we TOO swing out of the funk and begin “getting real again”. That’s when we can start making some gradual changes towards a better lifestyle.
Gotta run – gonna go play some golf today.
Love ya – Jacob
At Saneadvice.com we want to help our visitors learn to relax without the use of medication. If you can learn to relax and remove stress from your life without medication, it’s what you want to do first.
The most important thing for you to do on a daily basis is meditate. There are many resources online that you can use for learning the art of meditation, like the TM site, and we at SA would like to put up a very simple and easy meditation technique that is only 10 minutes long. This meditation should be done twice a day, but three is better, and one is just helpful. Do it once in the morning before you start your day, and once later in the day when you have finished all or any chores, work, etc. Instead of turning on the TV as soon as you have some time to kill, meditate first.
I am going to use some sample videos from Claire Diab that will prepare you for your meditation. These are Youtube clips I put up so you can try meditation, without having to invest anything money wise -- just time wise. However, these clips are far from the entire DVD which goes through everything in MUCH more detail, so if you want to learn much more about mediation, please see Claire Diab’s web site and order her books, DVDs, and CDs there. Sane Advice is a non-profit blog for anxiety suffers, so we do not profit from linking to Claire’s web site. We just know she truly cares about helping people and making money is a natural bi-product of success.
Now on with the meditation process. These clips come from Claire’s DVD called, “Breathe….Move…..Meditate”, where she guides you through a 10 minute, 20 minute, and 30 minute meditations, including the pre-meditation breathing exercises. Here is a bit from her site;
Claire Diab will teach you mantra meditation, breathing techniques, chakra toning and the six directions of the spine. These powerful breathing techniques help to purify and cleanse your lungs, which in turn purifies and nourishes every single cell in your body.
If you have never meditated before, you can use a simple and effective mantra which is provided by Claire as well. You will use the mantra SO -- HUM -- NAMAH. You make these sounds to yourself slowly and easily, so you can pretty well do this anywhere. This is silent meditation. But first the breathing exercises to do before we start the mantra.
Now start your 10 minute meditation period. Close your eyes, and slowly, calmy, gently, repeat the mantra from above;
SOOOOO - HUMMMMM -- NAMAHHHHHHH…………………SOOOOO - HUMMMMM -- NAMAHHHHHHH
If you hear noises in the background, just focus back on your mantra, SO -- HUM -- NAMAH. If you have any thoughts that disturb your mantra, just go back to the mantra SO -- HUM -- NAMAH.
If you have never meditated before, you will find that your mind will fight back against you somewhat and disturb your thoughts. That is normal. Just focus back on the mantra, and after awhile your mind will calm down, and after a further while you will feel a sensation of nothingness when your mind has calmed down completely and you in your true and natural state.
Just 10 minutes a day, twice a day, is amazing. If you can do 30 minutes twice a day even better.
I will be posting Youtube video clips to show these steps as well. Once again, these are just small clips of Claire’s instructions.
Today I want to talk a little bit about the relationship between the ego and anxiety in a personal way. Ironically, I have had allot of anxiety these past few days, and I’m now processing and using my anti-anxiety tool kit to put everything back in perspective. As I write this I am in the anxiety cloud stage which I have talked about before. So here we go.
Notice how your mind is being used to visualize these things I’m asking you to visualize. Notice how the mind is simply a tool that the ego will try to hijack, but yet it’s a tool your true self uses as well. The difference is that your true self uses the mind correctly, while the ego uses your mind incorrectly.
When you FEEL you true self using your mind correctly, you will feel a sensation of witnessing. Your goal is to let “the witness” have ownership of your mind. The witness is actually the universal mind speaking through you. You will be finally conscious to reality, and not the falsehoods your ego has been perpetuating.
If you are thinking any scary thoughts, or fears, don’t you worry! This is just the frightened ego panicking. The ego is not your enemy though, O.K. – look upon your ego as nothing more than a frightened child that needs some direction. It’s never about killing your ego – it’s all about accepting and witnessing your ego, and taking it by the hand with love and kindness.
What we’re doing here is taking your ego by the hand and going for a walk. Explain to your ego that everything is going to be fine. Tell your ego things like, “Don’t worry – we’ll have lots of fun in the future, and I have not forgotten you.”
Tell your ego that you love him or her. Tell your ego that you are going to look after everything, and that it will never be alone. Then tell your ego that you are going to take control the reins for awhile, because it has been worrying much too much about the future, and feeling much to much guilt about the past.
Explain to your ego that it’s NOT going crazy in any way. Explain to your ego that it’s just a normal human trait to feel these emotions from time to time. Remember that all of this fear will pass. Remember that any time you are feeling frightened, it’s the ego in you that is trying to take the wheel for total control.
Gently, with a loving touch, ease your ego’s fingers off the steering wheel. Put a hand on your ego’s head and turn to look him or her in the eye. At this point of the thought process, imagine seeing your ego face to face. You may see a child which is very common. (this is what some in the recovery movement do to identify their “inner child” and forgive it with love. When recovery movements, therapies, or self-help literature speak of the inner child, they are actually describing of the ego)
All you want to do is loosen the grip your worried ego has and allow the true presence of yourself take over. When you have worry free days, and you feel happy, content, and not afraid, you are feeling positive about the future and present moment. You are not moved by guilt of the past, or remorse of the past either. You are not moved by guilt just because you thought badly of other people. When you have these great days, it’s your ego feeling satisfied with everything going on in your life currently, and your true self rejoices in the bliss of the moment because it’s always been there waiting patiently for your ego to understand that “everything is alright”.
Unfortunately, when your life situation is not ideal, and there is external stress to deal with, your ego can begin to feel overwhelmed and afraid. It then tries paint everything black and tries to block out your eternal bliss. This is when you are miserable and anxious. Some people spill all their anger, fear, rage, and misery outwards, causing suffering and pain for all others around them. They feel some relief for a brief instance, and then their ego manages to quickly start “beating themselves up”, causing even more anxiety for themselves. Often when this kind of ego enslavement is in action the human will then resort to some sort of drug or alcohol “solution”, which is also brief, and followed by more guilt, physical discomfort, and more external drama perpetrated on other human beings. This is what the Bible and other faith-based teachings define as hell – and all along it never HAS to be this way.
Now for those who suffer from anxiety, we usually internalize our ego-based anger, sadness, fear, and loathing. This causes our anxiety disorders. Remember the old bumper sticker and poster of the 1970′s that had this saying?,
“Stress: The confusion created when one’s mind overrides the body’s basic desire to choke the living daylights out of some jerk who desperately deserves it”
This is an ego-based statement. It’s surely funny, but why is it so funny? Because it’s makes us laugh at our silly human egos. We all have moments in our lives when we are really angry (disconnected from reality) and we think to ourselves something like, “I’d like to punch that person out”.
Of course, the vast majority of people on earth don’t act on a thought like that, because deep inside we know it’s a ridiculous and hateful thing to do, and we’re afraid of what will happen as well. So when we have a chance to laugh at our own angry moments and negative emotions, it’s a great relief. I think I’ve mentioned before that laughing at yourself (or your ego actually) is great therapy when you are stressed out.
This funny saying is true in some ways for people who suffer from anxiety sometimes. We don’t spill outward our fear and anger because we don’t want to hurt or upset others. We take it inward and not outward. On a purely temporary point of view, it would seem that the person who spills out their grief and pain on others is better off – but not in the long run. In the long run these people suffer much more, and are usually left without any kind of human support later in life.
The trick to relieving anxiety for most people is to accept it for it’s temporary existance, literally laugh at your fear, ease off the self absorbtion with activity and movement, and stop taking ourselves so seriously. In other words, stop taking ego-based and false selves so seriously.
Have you ever seen some of the pictures of Buddha laughing. This is what the truth is. The truth is fearless and alive. We can laugh at ourselves as a way to disspate the ego which controls our mind processes during stress bouts.
Try chuckling and laughing at all things you’ve been worried about or sad about. I know how hard it is to that when you are in the middle of a stressful time, but it can help a little – if not briefly.
Rest assured that your anxiety will be gone soon, and always has in the past. It is NOT a permanent thing. With or without medication, you will get through the stressful times, and realize how silly your little ego is to so afraid.
So to update my current situation as I write this post. I still feel like I’m in the anxiety cloud and writing about anxiety is probably not the best thing to do at the moment, but honestly, and look at all times of anxiety as a chance to learn. Even as I have been in the full anxiety mode today, I deep down inside feel like there is hope, bright blue sky days, happy happy times, beautiful sunsets and sunrises, smiling faces, and stress free days, weeks, months, and years ahead of me.
This is the true mystery of the human mind – even when our egos are taking everything so seriously, and is making our days miserable, we can still feel that somewhat distant voice of reality that is never gone. It’s quietly speaking the truth about the beauty of life, and when the clouds of anxiety pass by, the blue sky of peace and tranquility will be waiting for us. Just writing this makes me feel better.
This is the first time that I’ve ever written a post while under extreme stress so it’s interesting. I’m not sure how long I will continue writing, but the words seem to keep coming out.
My wife is almost ready now to go out, and we putting our dogs (two Golden Retrievers) in our little GMC truck, and going to the dump (landfill) to get rid of some dirt and branches we cleared away a couple of weeks ago. It’s a perfectly blue sky day today, and you would have to wonder why I would feel anxious at all. I have a big house in an upscale neighborhood, a perfect job for me (which is blogging from home) and pays very well, our kids are both out of the house and doing very well. It’s late August and it’s warm and perfect. Our financial house is in order and we are in good health. We travel all the time because our job’s allow for this kind of freedom. We do that in a brand new motor home we bought last year. So how could I possibly feel anxiety? Good question. I don’t quite know either, but I have a guess.
It means so much to me that other people are doing OK in the world, and I can easily get very wrapped up in the “state of the world”. I also get very wrapped in United States politics, and the last 9 years has been difficult to watch. Seeing all of the problems Americans are going through has caused me alot of stress – basically I have caused myself allot of stress because I have chosen to let me ego take control and lament about the plight of others. It’s hard for me to see the suffering of others and write if off as part of the divine order of life on earth.
I know that there are other countries and other peoples who are suffering much more than Americans, but I have always felt that if American can get it’s act together, there is a chance for the rest of world. It’s like the flight attendant that tells parents to make sure they have their oxygen mask on first before helping their children. I use this as a metaphor for the United States and the world. If the U.S.A can get it together, they can help with influence in the rest of the world. Not with leathal weapons, but with compassion, leadership, and diplomacy. It’s a dream – a good dream, but for my own stress levels I have to accept that there is tragedy in the world, and that I will not see what I perceive to be a perfect world. This is the naive state that my adult mind still plays with sometimes.
This is how over-sized my own ego is. It will actually try and convince me that I should feel guilt for the suffering of others, because I have been so lucky. This is why I started Saneadvice.com, and why I don’t use my real name, and why there is no advertising on this site. I needed to create a web site that helps people through their anxiety issues, without me gaining from it, and without me taking credit for it.
(I have other web sites that are not about self-help and anxiety, and they are purely for making money. This is why my wife and I free and make a good living)
I think the reason I am so anxious today is because it is tax time, it’s the month end, and I’v been feeling tired and a little ill. I have been watching too much news as the United States Congress, Senate, and Whitehouse grapple with trying to fix their nation’s healthcare problem. I see some extreme so-called right-wing people trying to scare people for the sake of large profit hungry insurance companies, and medical services related companies. I see the elected politicians in the U.S. government taking contributions from these same private companies which is the ultimate in conflict of interest. Meanwhile I see over 35 million people in the United States who don’t have health care at all, and hundreds of thousand of others losing the health care they have. I see the great injustice of all this, and I get very angry. This is pure ego, and I’ll feel better when I just let it go. I can pray for these people. I can pray for the United States and World, and really that is the best I can do.
So this too maybe what has brought on this anxiety. Like I have said before, it’s usually a combination of things adding up over time which bring on anxiety problems, and it alway means I have been processing what I see the wrong way. In order to see the reality of life I can’t be constantly telling myself how messed up the world is, or people are. I have to stop judging so many things as bad, or “not right”, and I have to give up control all together. Just let things be as they are and accept it. Then I have to learn once again what is the truth.
The truth is that I don’t have to take myself so seriously, and I’m NOT going to “save the world”, and I’m not heading for a personal disaster. As all people who have experienced extreme anxiety know – our common sense feels like it’s impossible to grasp when we are “out there” consumed with fear.
I must say that now I feel much better because of what just happened in our living room. My wife’s computer was not working for her, and it was something very simple and I knew it. I got frustrated, and as I was trying to help her (as quickly as possible) I acted angry in my face expressions, and tone of voice. I fixed her monitor problem, and then I apologized for seeming angry, and explained that I was feeling stress.
She responded by saying, “Oh, I thought you were just being an insensitive prick.” I began to laugh out loud and so did she. There is an inside joke here and it goes like this.
I told my wife once that when I’m deeply anxious I get quieter, I eat less, I move by body (more exercise), I stop smoking, and I become more aware of how I am treating others. I told her that when I’m feeling better, I’m less sensitive to others, I over eat, I don’t exercise, I smoke, I don’t worry. She said jokingly,
“So let me get this right – when you are feeling good, you are a fat and lazy insensitive prick” We both started to laugh loudly. This is good comfort to laugh at yourself.
Well we must go to the dump now. This post has helped move things along in my discission on the ego and how serious we can get. We must learn to float and not get “bent out of shape” when things we see and witness don’t go according to our egos.
The answer to my stress today is very simple friends – my little ego is upset because it is not seeing exactly what it wants. When I give up this ego and learn to laugh at my ego, I will start to feel like “myself again”.
Sorry if anyone reading Saneadvice.com ever thought that I had “my shit together” completely, and that I never have extreme anxiety on some days. The reality is that no human ever totally conquers their ego. We can learn to live with our ego though, and we can spend most all our time relaxing in the moment.
There are certain key thought processes that can stop a panic attack, when you are in the middle of the attack, and there are the all-important thought processes to use to get yourself back in a better place all around.
So this post is called the “Seven Keys to Recovering from a Panic Episode”. Here I will list the seven thought processes you can undergo in order to stop a panic attack, greatly reduce stress overall, and then enter your “place of bliss”.
Follow these steps in order, and don’t move to the next step until you have fully absorbed and FELT the feeling, not just THOUGHT of the idea.
This first step is extremely important for you if you are presently in the midst of a panic attack or extreme anxiety. You need to calm yourself down by simply ACCEPTING your moment. No matter how bad your anxiety is in the current moment, just say to yourself that you accept the situation. Don’t judge your anxiety attack as bad, good, or anything in between. Just look upon your present anxious moment with a loving observer’s view point. Don’t beat yourself up – just close your eyes and FEEL acceptance of the moment. Once you feel acceptance, you will be amazed at how quickly your anxious thoughts begin to dissipate.
No matter what is causing your anxiety, this acceptance will work for you, but you must feel it. Focus your energy and attention on your body – your chest, your breathing, your legs, your arms, your shoulders, your hands, feet, etc – and feel the acceptance of your present moment situation. Don’t move on to the next steps until you have done this first step. Remember that you are not alone right now. There is the presence of pure love all around you no matter how much your ego and worried mind have tried to convince you otherwise.
All writings from all sages at some point mention the importance of acceptance. The very root, and core reason, for why us human beings suffer from anxiety is because we are resisting what is. We may be thinking about a possible “bad” outcome, or stressing about past issues. If you are able to simply exist in the very moment of your being, it is impossible to have stress symptoms. You can learn a heap about the art of living in the moment by reading Eckhart Tolle’s book A New Earth, and I encourage you to do so. I talk about the art of living in the now in one of the later keys.
For instance, if you have anxiety attacks triggered from driving, or being in public, just focus on accepting your current position. If you are stuck on the highway on a long and busy commute, and you feel anxiety pulsing through your body, tell yourself that you accept the moment, and remember that you are just fine. Just watch the road, your mirrors, and breath deeply. Accept and watch how your anxiety begins to drop and maybe even fade away completely.
Going within is the next step once you have FELT acceptance. Once again, going within must be “felt” and not just “thought”. Remember that your ego, your mind, all external people, and all external form, is not the real you. The real you is within – deep within.
In this key (or step) you need to FEEL your inner body and feel all external form leaving your inner domain. Your body truly is a temple of God (or universal love if you prefer) and deep inside your physical form exists a silent and sacred place – basically your body is made up of from the same the particles, atoms, molecules, as the universe. What dwells inside of you is perfect and untouched by all external “happenings” and “events”.
Use your mind to visualize your body taking in it’s breath and exhaling it’s breath. Imagine all of your internal organs, bones, blood, and joints in their silent perfection, and notice how it only lives and breaths in this moment. Your body carries out it’s living miracle without worry or fear, and it is attached to universal love, kindness, and affection. It’s a perfect vessel regardless if it’s in a wheel chair, on crutches, overweight, underweight, bald, hairy, dirty, clean, sweaty, white, brown, black, pink, or green. This has nothing to do with what society calls beauty. This is the same for all humans living on earth, no matter what their living situation.
So remember all of these facts as you focus your energy on your breathing and your inner body. Imagine and see all of your worries, concerns, and events as part of your mind and ego’s reality, because your fear and anxiety is NOT a part of your true reality – your true self does not even understand what fear and anxiety is. Period.
After you have practiced acceptance, and you have FELT your focus going deep inside your body, you will most certainly begin feeling MUCH better. Your stress and anxiety will seem to be nothing more than a cloud existing outside of your body and owned by your false ego and mind.
Next key step is to be the witness, watch the witness, and understand the witness.
“The Witness” is a term used by many ancient contemporary faiths and religions – and for good reason. The witness is divine energy and it is the real you. The witness is your true self as it exists in the cosmic soup of living energy in the universe. I it is what most peoples of earth call God.
There is nothing fancy about seeing and feeling the witness. It’s perfectly natural, and the only truth you can know. It is actually where miracles are manifested. It’s where pure love and light exist.
Instead of listening to your ego, as it is trying to scare the hell out of you, let the witness take control of your mind. You can always recognize the witness because it only uses your mind to think thoughts of love, compassion, and kindness – kindness and love for all life on earth, and this INCLUDES YOU!
Witness the witness as it is watching you, the people around you, the air around you, the trees, the furniture, the sky, and ground and floor beneath your feet. FEEL the witness above your head fondly smiling upon you. This witness is God, Jesus, and every loving soul that has ever temporarily inhabited a body on earth.
Notice how the witness loves you and all around you. Notice how the witness IS you. Notice how the witness is completely detached from your ego’s worrying and role playing. Feel how the witness accepts all that you are and all that you have felt in your life.
When you start hearing kind and compassionate words going through your head telling how everything is going to be O.K., you know the witness is manifesting it’s presence for you to feel.
The witness NEVER leaves you. The ego will use your mind to confuse you, scare you, and cloud over the witness it’s seems to be gone – it’s not gone and can never be gone! Only our ego comes and goes, and only your mind’s chatter comes and goes, judges, and frets.
Sense the witness as it watches over you will love, never judging anything good or bad. The witness knows that your temporary stress and anxiety is due the ego’s behavior, but never sees your ego as bad. It sees the ego as a necessary part of your human existence, which simple role is to suffer in order for your mind to learn who it’s true master is – the loving witness.
Understanding the exist of your worrisome ego, and seeing how it is unreal, and knowing that your true self just watches what goes down, is another important step on the road a peaceful and blissful moment in time.
So feel the witness now. If you hear negative dialogue manifesting in your thoughts, that is just the ego trying desperately to regain control of you moment. Don’t be concerned with ANY of your thoughts, because your mind is really just a chaotic tool that is pulled out for use when it’s required. Your mind will eventually quiet down. That is next.
Quieting your mind is another beautiful way to discover in more relief. The witness described above will only use your mind for doing works and acts of love and kindness – when it’s not using your mind, it’s silent – dead silent.
So many practices of ancient and modern times involve quieting the mind. Many experts on this subject call the quieting of mind, finding the gap. Wayne Dyer has written a short book, and it’s accompanying CD, called Getting Into The Gap, which shows another way to quiet your mind completely.
TM (or Transcendental Meditation) is arguable the best way to quiet your mind and enter your sacred realm of universal connection. I urge you to look into this method.
If you use the first 3 key steps as above you will be able to begin focusing on the quieting of your mind all together. If you are in the middle of stress an anxiety, you will need your mind active so the witnessing REAL YOU can focus your energies and attentions as above, but once you have achieved these above steps, you can then “shut your mind down”.
When you are able to quiet your mind (and it does not have to be perfect) I urge you to have a little nap. Let your body have the ultimate rest, as your mind goes along with it.
If you wake up and notice anxiety and stress rippling through your body and mind again, immediately let your witness take back control, and focus your energy back within your inner body. Start the process over and quickly you can be back on with a good moment, second, minute, hour, and day.
Try finding moments of the day when you can get a few minutes alone to quiet your mind. You will be amazed at the transformation in your life. You will become very relaxed and creativity will begin flow, as you start making the inevitable changes in your outer life – meaning relationships, jobs, surrounding, habits, recreations, and patterns.
Once you have FELT and learned the above practices, you must always remind yourself using your mind, via the witness, to completely disregard the past and the future. This may seem impossible if you have never heard something like this idea. You may think this is radical, and unrealistic, but it truly is where bliss lives.
This does not mean you don’t recall something from the past for practical purposes, or make plans for tomorrow, next week, next month, or next year. It’s means you use the past and future as POSITIVE tools to flow in your present moment. You don’t need to visit the past or anticipate the future for more than a few brief seconds a day for practical reasons. Outside of that – BURN THE PAST, and BURN THE FUTURE – they are not real. The only thing that is real is your present breath that you are taking into your body as you read this sentence.
Remember the rules of your true and eternal self. You are not your money (or debt), your job, your marriage, your kids, your house, your car, your reputation, your past, or fear, or your problems. Your eternal and REAL self is the witness that is watching your physical life as manifested in flesh for your experience here on earth.
I know this may sound “out there” to some readers, but this the reality of our existence. All near-death experiences documented (and there are thousands and thousands studied every year) show the reality of an eternal self that is still witnessing your physical journey (even when your body is lifeless).
Quantum physicists have long discovered that at the particle level of our bodies there is nothing but space between atoms and particles. Your body is really just an energy form. Same goes for dense objects such as rocks and minerals. There is nothing but movement at the sub-atomic level. We are extremely fluid beings even at our pure physical manifestation. Even is energy at the sub-atomic level, and that includes your thoughts. Thoughts create energy (or more accurately are energy) so they are very powerful indeed.
You are an energy field. Plain simple fact. This is the miracle of life, and life is friendly. Never forget that you are imminently more important than your problems and life situation. Never forget that you are a miracle and you are as powerful as the universe – you just don’t know it yet.
So detach yourself from the petty games people play around you, at work, at home, in traffic, in the neighborhood, etc. etc. As you detach, make sure you detach with love and kindness. Don’t judge others as “bad”, or even “good” for that matter. Don’t judge them at all, no matter how disconnected and rude they can be. Just witness them with love and kindness. I know that this sounds “soft” and “weak” to your ego, but it is the truth. Deep inside you know this and you can feel it. Send a silent thought of understanding as other people carry out their lives trapped in their human disease of ego.
Engage yourself in your daily and momentary life, but detach from the outcomes, and all of the negative noise your fellow humans spew, and ALL of the negative noise your ego can spew.
So keep in mind that you are lighter than your body weight. Float with your breathing, and KNOW that happenings and occurrences need to not stick to you in any way. Your ego is going to fight this because it is fighting for it’s fantasy. The ego will creep in even when you are an enlightened person of earth. The difference between and enlightened person and an unenlightened person witnessing. An enlightened person still has bad days and bad judgments when their egoic self is running the show, but they have less of them. When an enlightened person judges another person, he or she SEES it and is aware of the truth. This is the difference. Awareness.
So stay aware and detach from the forms of human life that are swirling around you.
Now when you have learned to apply all of the 6 key steps above, make sure you make a habit of entering your bliss. This comes down to simple time management. Find (MAKE!) time to get yourself alone away from the noise and activities of life to go within, detach, and meditate with “the witness”. Do this is often as you can and you will find yourself stress free almost all of the time.
You WILL slip and let your ego have the day sometimes, but it will be for a short time. With you new awareness you will see what is really going and realize that NOTHING is worth getting upset about.
Read books from writers that teach you how to enter into a peaceful state. Look for new ways to find information regarding freedom of stress and energy level peace. Enter your bliss as often as possible.
KNOW that these words are not just a poof of smoke from “a wierd softy”. These words are truth and don’t come from me at all – they come from universal love. They come from God. I am just the witness that is taking dictation. Nothing more.
Enter your bliss when you wake up. Enter your bliss on your way to work or doing chores around the house. Enter your bliss when you are preparing to go to sleep. Enter your bliss when you communicate with others, and associate with co-workers and family members.
Enter your bliss when something happens that is so-called “bad”.
Enjoy this day friend.
Jacob
